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Maranoia Checklist

Maranoia Checklist 

In the week before a marathon, these are some of my usual (irrational) thoughts;
  • Have I done enough mileage
  • Have I done too much mileage
  • Am I drinking enough water
  • Am I drowning myself in water
  • Why is my leg suddenly hurting
  • The weather forecast is looking horrendously hot
  • Why do I put myself through this
  • Where did I put my passport
  • What if my flight is cancelled/late
  • Will I faceplant it after falling over tram tracks again
  • Are all Europeans going to hate me after Brexit 
  • What if I expend too much energy walking before the race
  • What if I feel bloated/heavy at the start
  • When shall I time my constitutionals
  • What if I get really hungry during the race
  • Will I hallucinate and see images of David Bowie baking cakes again
  • Should I have bought new trainers
  • What if I go the wrong way on the course
  • How do I purchase a banana in a Polish fruit shop
  • Will I be sick like I was on the dual carriageway in Thessaloniki
  • How the hell do I get to the Expo
  • Am I going to be murdered by the hostel owner
  • How many ibuprofens can I take without causing myself kidney damage
  • Have I got enough vaseline (everywhere)
  • Do I have enough Motorhead on my playlist
  • Does my time really matter (have I collected enough excuses to cock it up)
  • Will I get beaten to the finish by a Womble like in London
  • Is the big hill as big as everyone says it is
  • Will they be giving out paper cups or bottles of water
  • Will I be able to get out of bed the next day
  • Did I taper to soon/too late
  • Can I get a steak dinner and keg of Peroni after the race at midnight in Luxembourg

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